there are times when you think life is tough enough without making it harder on yourself.
and you mess up the best things in life because you're tired of how hard it is.
it's hard to understand yourself when you think that way.
but you also try to struggle with the fact that life is difficult enough as it is, and do you want to make it harder?
but. but. but.
and the struggle between wanting to make things easier for you in the short-term and knowing how the long-term is worth the wait.
honestly makes you just want to take yourself out of the picture. or someone will see that you aren't worth it? you'd rather be the one hurting than make someone else hurt coz you're a stupid git after all.